Top 5 Underrated UN Bodies


  1. Ban Ki Moon: The eyes, the lips, the slight wattle just below the chin — Ban Ki Moon took the world by storm in 2007 with his air of bravado, sonorous voice, and, of course, rockin’ bod. While he might appear meek from afar, don’t be fooled: Mr. Moon can take you there.
  2. Antonio Guterres: The current Secretary-General of the UN is a particularly perfectly proportioned Portuguese beefcake, clocking in at a positively auspicious 69 years old. The leader of the international system as we know it might seem inaccessible, but one look into his deep brown eyes and you’re liable to get lost.
  3. Dag Hammerskjold: Only the smokin’ die young, said Neil Diamond (or someone), and our next overlooked stud is a perfect example. A dashing Norwegian with a forehead as striking as a Patriot Missile, Dag Hammerskjold was a Secretary-General made for the movie screen. You can’t tell us you don’t wish his plane wasn’t the only thing going down right now.
  4. John Bolton’s Mustache: The mustache makes the man, it’s often claimed, but in this case, the mustache may be the man. Utterly Walrusian in nature, battle-hardened and bushy, Mr. Bolton’s mustache is a much-needed bold statement in a timid time. Like the froth on an improperly poured glass of beer, this absolute unit of a facial accoutrement is beautiful, if fleeting. Stay gold, Mr. Bolton’s mustache, stay gold.
  5. U Thant: One of the lesser known Secretaries-General, U Thant is nothing short of a god amongst men. Feast your eyes upon the picture below for a moment, then tell us you didn’t feel a stirring deep within (U Can’t). With perfect skin, fashionable glasses, and a scandalously seductive stare, U Thant is the epitome of the sexy Secretary-General.